Flashback

Ever just sat and looked at a photo and thought of all those happy memories? Well, that's what I've been doing this evening. I came across one a few months ago that was taken about 3 years ago. Every now and then I pull it out and look at it and just remember how happy I was then. What happened to that? I'm not going on a pity rant about how my life is so terrible, I mean I'm still happy just not as much as then. That photo from that summer makes me remember the really good thing that I had, and all the good times we had together. But it also brings back the thoughts of how horribly I ruined things. I just don't understand why I was so stupid. Why couldn't I see that what I had was amazing and that nothing else mattered?

The only upside is that I learned a lot from that decision, and it gave me the opportunity to make more mistakes and learn from them as well. I feel like I've grown a lot as a person since then, and I've learned how to better appreciate a good thing when I have it.

Now the obstacle is getting back what I lost. God keeps throwing it back in my life, so there must be a good reason for it. I guess the time I've spent on it so far will make me value it more when I get it back, if I get it back...hopefully....

I'm not really sure what else to do. I've been praying about it for months, and I'm getting some answers. I'm just not really sure what's going on or what's about to happen, if that makes any sense.

I guess I'll just continue praying and trust that if it's in God's plan for me, it will happen.